30 September 2013
Dear Second Grade
Me,
So, it’s the fall
of 1981 and here you are in Miss Cole’s second grade class. It hasn’t really sunk in to you
yet that you are repeating the second grade. Lots of things you are experiencing now don’t make
sense to you yet. What I’m about
to tell you will become clear to you as you grow up, although, I’m going to be
honest with you, some of the things may not really become clear to you for many
years. However, trust me, while
there are things right now that you can’t even begin to understand, in a few
years, you will.
You don’t really
have a name for it right now, but you know how you don’t really like girls but
you like the boys? It’s because you are gay. That means you are a boy who likes boys. As you grow up,
some people will want to use this against you to bully you, to make fun of you,
and to make you feel like you are a bad person, undeserving of the same rights
and freedoms as everyone else. You
just stay strong. It’s going
to be ok. Sure, you’ll
endure some name calling, but there will always be people on your side. Some of those people who are mean
to you today don’t know any better.
One day they will understand, and not only will they respect you; they
will become some of your biggest fans.
You see, in your lifetime, you’re going to see what are called “openly
gay” people on television, in movies…even in your daily life. You will be an agent of change
just by showing those around you that you are proud of yourself. Oh, it won’t be an easy road. Actually, it’s going to be quite a
scary place at times. You’ll
cry. You’ll laugh. You’ll want to give up. But you won’t. You’ll keep going, because you’re going
to have friends who support you every step of the way.
Speaking of friends,
I know how you often feel very lonely right now, even if it is something you
don’t recognize. The truth
is you don’t even know right now that the people in your class have sleepovers
and have birthday parties on the weekends to which you aren’t ever invited.
You’re blissfully unaware. You’ll
have some very close friends one day, but don’t worry—it won’t happen until you
are in college and even well into adulthood, but it WILL happen.
One day, you’ll
wake up and realize that while life isn’t perfect, that you really do have
everything you need. Here’s
a sneak peak of your life by the time you get to 40. You’ll not only learn music, after high school you’ll
go on to earn a Bachelor of Arts in Voice, so when your parents keep telling
you “no” every time you ask for piano lessons, it’s ok, because one day you
will grow up and share the gift of music with others. Don’t worry about being
the last kid chosen to play games at recess. Sports isn’t your thing, anyway. There are a few things you will regret
as you get older—you’ll wish you had learned to read more and that you had been
encouraged to read for pleasure. Something
you’re going to find really cool when you get older is that “Miss Cole” will
become someone you respect a lot, even going so far as to call her a friend. You,
after all, were part of her first class. Oh, and that thing about repeating the second grade? You’ll come consider that one of the
greatest things your parents EVER did for you. Many years from now, you’ll
reconnect with her on a place called “facebook”—I won’t spoil the surprise for
the future, but facebook is something of which almost everyone is a part. One more thing…next year, in 1982, The World’s
Fair will be in Knoxville.
You’ll have the chance to go a few times. Be sure to soak up every little moment that you can. It will be something really neat to say
you were a part of when you get older.
Here’s my
confession: In some ways, I think
it would have been nice to have a letter from the future telling us how things
would turn out. Yet, at the
same time, I have to confess, I like the adventure of not knowing everything. Isn’t it the blind experiences of life
that help create who we are? What
I have learned in my 40 years on earth is that in the grand scheme of things,
that life is pretty good.
Everything that happens is for a reason, and usually builds on other
events. Rainbows are one of the
most beautiful visions known to humans—however, in order for a rainbow to
appear, we have to endure a little bit of rain. So it is with life. Storms come, we get battered then the rainbow
appears. So it has been with
my life.
Love,
me
Love,
me
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